A 2010 recap (because everyone is doing it)

I should get one more post out before 2010 ends, so here's a quick "Best of 2010" list I've been thinking of for the past few days

Movie:

Scott Pilgrim

TV Show:

Last season of Lost

And for "new this year" it has to be The Walking Dead

Comic:

Action Comics starring Lex Luthor

Book:

I'm trying to remember if I read any books that came out this year. Let's say I did, but they all sucked, so I don't have to talk about them. Anyway, a book I did read, and loved, was The Anatomy Murders by Lisa Rosner. A nonfiction book about Burke and Hare; two guys in the 1800's who would kill strangers and sell their bodies to the local college for dissection. Really great dinner conversation stuff.

Celebrity I met:

Jim Steranko, hands down. I met him at two cons this year and he was the highlight of both. If you look up the word gentleman in the dictionary, there is a picture of Steranko (and his perfect hair).

Booze:

Kraken rum. It came out in 2009, but I just started buying it this year. Dark and spicy, this rum adds a few bare knuckle punches to any drink you mix.

BPAL Limited Edition scent:

Well, might as well just admit it, I'm one of those fangirls who nerd out over perfume oil. Yes, I smell like a goth kid. Anyway, the Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab scent that I geeked out over this year was Elephantine Colossus, a NYCC exclusive.

Moment:

At first, I was going to be all New York Comic Con!!!! It was my first time going to NYCC and it was awesome, and fun, and I had a freaking blast.

Then, I remember I got engaged this year to the best guy a nerdy, chubby alcoholic like me could ever wish for. I can't even begin to explain the warmth, love, and happiness that man has brought into my life. The best moment of the year 2010 was when he asked me to be his wife....The second best though, was totally NYCC.

Tron! (I fell asleep through part of it)

Tron! Tron on Christmas day after Chinese food and beer! Tron in 3D AND IMAX! Tron...is ever so slightly boring...but still worth seeing! Maybe just not in 3D and after too much food.

OK, before I start on about the movie, let's make a two cranky points about 3D and IMAX:

1. 3D is not comfortable when you already wear glasses. It's awkward and uncomfortable to wear two sets of glasses on top of each other. Are there clip on 3D frames for people who wear glasses? Like those clip on sunglasses.

2. IMAX is way too much when you are sitting in the second row. Never sit in the second row; if you are going to get stuck in the second row, just leave the movie. Craning my head and swinging it back and forth drove me nuts.

Alright, onto the movie!

Basically, Flinn has made this giant wiki he calls The Grid where everything is free and happy. Then Flinn goes missing and 20 years later, Flinn's son Sam (how many plucky young heros are named Sam? Why is it always Sam?) goes to the arcade, gets sucked into the grid, finds his dad, finds his dad's evil avatar, Clu, finds his slightly-addicted-to-liquid-liner half sister...future...girlfriend....program....thingie...we'll talk about that part later....helps everyone out, blows up The Grid (?), and then rides into the sunset. Let's talk!

So, I never ever like the whole Disney trope of orphanism. Why can't people be adventurous heros and have their parents? Or grandparents? Who the hell raised Sam? Seriously, we find out Flinn's wife died, then Flinn disappears, then Sam tells us his grandparents died. Who watched this kid? Did he raise himself? Is that why he lives in a garage at the banks of a river, which no heating or bathroom? Whatever.

OK, so Sam goes into The Grid, we see young Jeff Bridges/Clu as this evil overlord (he even does the overlord slouchy sitting thing), Sam sees this, too, and had to bust out in some SERIOUSLY SWEET LIGHT CYCLES! Holy shit! 3D rules! Light cycles rule! You sure as hell better enjoy that because they are so not going to be in the movie after this!

Finally, we get to The Dude. Wait, I mean old Jeff Bridges. Hold on, I mean Flinn. No, actually, I mean The Dude meets a Jedi costume. A glowing Jedi costume. I don't know, it's a zen thing. However, whenever they let Jeff Bridges be Jeff Bridges, the movie instantly gets +5 funnier and +5 watchable. If it was just Jeff Bridges, hanging out in his weird white cliff side apartment, eating suckling pig, saying 'man' and 'dude,' I still would have gone to watch it in 3D/IMAX. I love that stuff, man.

Um, OK, now we have to get to Quorra (who I thought was named Cara, but girl has to be special and special her name all wonky). So, she's Flinn's apprentice, who is also a program/magical ISO (some kind of super special program that "came into being" while Flinn was chillaxing in The Grid). Basically, she has been hanging out, learning from Flinn, being his adopted daughter, waiting to experience the user world. If you've seen the movie posters, you know she's the love interest of Sam's. Yes, and she's his half brother. Yes, it's gross and weird. Don't worry, everyone was slightly confused by that.

Oy.

Anyway, besides the weird Flowers in the Attic action, and the whole ambiguous ending of The Grid (it was blown up, right? Or what else happened there?), and Bradley randomly showing up at the end (I can't believe Sam left him there at the arcade! How is he going to get out of Detroit?!), it was a...good enough sequel. Listen, I'm not going to say that it was better than the first one, but it had what I wanted out of a Tron sequel. Action, The Dude, light cycles, and eyeliner abuse.

Knight and Squire: My new favorite Britons

There are two ways a comic like Knight and Squire could go. It could suck (like Superman walking across America to reconnect), or it could be amazing (like Lex Luthor and his Louis-Bot). Thankfully, the comic gods have decided to smile upon us, for the deemed that Knight and Squire shall be amazing.

And amazing it is.

As Paul Cornell says himself, this is an insane spinoff of Batman and Robin. And where Batman is the broodiest of all orphans, Knight and Squire have jaunty romps through Merry England, filled with nods to British culture and humor. It's a fun comic!

But I think the best part is the little feminist ideals I see in Beryl (Squire). She's tough, and quick witted, definitely the brains of the two. Plus, the artist Jimmy Broxton has the piece of mind to actually draw her like a teenager. She's wearing baggy jeans, a teeshirt, and mary janes. She's got that spunky look reminiscent of Adrien Tomine's "Super-hero Girls." Her squire costume is outlandish to the point of bizarre, but when paired with the British Villains they fight (the Organ Grinder, who has a talking monkey, The Morris Men who boink people with sticks), it all makes sense.

If you're not reading this comic, pick it up now. You need to (because I say so).

The Comic Con prep sheet

We're hitting up a local con today, mostly because STERANKO! (and yes, his name must be written like that) is going to be there.

While getting ready for a day of comics, it got me wondering what is the essential list of stuff a girl needs to bring with her to a con? You don't want to go overboard bringing things or else you end up like those people with the rolling luggage (if you've been to ANY comic event, you've seen them), but you don't want to go in there all empty handed and ending up paying through the nose for things.

So, wonder no longer, my friends, because here is the BB&C Official Comic Con Prep List:

1. Your purse/bag

If you're bringing one, make sure it is the cross body strap kind. Hands-free is important at a con. Check out this one (roomy AND nerdy!).

2. Water bottle and snacks.

Mid-con snacking is important for your survival.

3. HAND SANITIZER

Please don't make me explain why you need this. Be a true geek and use something like this.

4. Cash

Every time I go to a con, and they say they take credit, the machine is always down. Plus, it is easier to haggle on prices when you can hand them the greenbacks.

5. Tote bag

Paper comic bags start adding up, just get a book tote to toss everything in. May I suggest this one or this one.

Cocktails and lack of comics

I was planning on reviewing Knight and Squire tonight. Mostly because I love Squire's insanely inane costume. Renaissance faire on top, high school goth on bottom; honestly, it's the best of both worlds (both sad, sad worlds). Yet, here I am, sans comics, because it was forgotten in the weekly pickup. No big deal! Instead, I will give you all my new favorite cocktail recipe. Because if I'm not reading comics, I'm drinking (and that's why I'm 20 pounds overweight).

These are the ingredients. The pumpkin is just set dressing

The Headless Horseman

Components:

Shot of Snap

Bottle of Dogfish Head Punkin Ale (other pumpkin beers will work, but I really like this one)

Much like the frat boy special known as a boilermaker, you take a shot of Snap, and drop it into about 1/2 a pint of Punkin, then chug chug chug. After a few of those, you've (warning! upcoming word play!) pretty much lost your head! If you want to be a refined mofo, just mix the the shot into the beer slowly and enjoy it as an after dinner drink.

Yes, this drink goes great with pumpkin pie, but you might want to bake one before you start drinking.

I can't even explain how terrified I am of him

I've been reading Batman and Robin for a while, and it's good. Good, good. This surprises me, because the idea of Damian should annoy the crap out of me; a precocious tween that backtalks and rides a motorcycle (pretty sure you need to be at least 18-years-old in any state...) is just terrible. You know it is, so don't front.

However, this post isn't about Baby D. Wayne and his scowl. It's about Professor Pyg: the scariest, freakiest evil villain ever. EVER. The character of Pyg actually scares me. His pig squealing, his evil freak show persona, his....dancing.

How does the fact he dropped down and got his eagle on not terrify you? No villain should ever dance. Period. OK, I will let Harley Quinn and the Joker dance, but that's it! No more! But the fact the Professor Pyg can get down better than me (and trust me, I went to school in North Philly, I can drop it hotter than most girls) doesn't bother me as much as his Dollotrons.

They are the type of things that give you nightmares and make you wake up in a cold sweat. Seriously, I'd wake up, freak out, and throw my shoes at my American Girl doll like it's Satan's spawn (It's not weird that I have a Molly in my bedroom...).

They are creepy on all the levels of creepy.

Level one: They used to be humans, and were lobotomized and zombie-fied through surgery.

Level two: They wear masks and...doll dresses. Like that creepy uncle whose "special outfits" you find one Thanksgiving when looking for extra toilet paper.

Level three: They don't speak. Ever. Blergh. I have a problem with things that don't speak. It's like those animatronic thingies in the It's a Small World ride.

Again, blergh. But kind of an impressed blergh? I'm actually surprised that there's a comic book villain that I'm scared of. I actually get the willies from this guy! And his creepy-ass minions! What the hell, Grant Morrison! Why you gotta go and make me scared of a comic book character?

Um...hmmm

OK, so I'm not reading the X-men thingie with the vampires (sticking to pretty much the Thunderbolts and Avenger Academy on the Marvel side of things); but this cover would totally make me start picking it up. Yes, it would party be for the tentacle throne (soooo want one for my place), but also, I love Namor's freaky Maila Nurmi eyebrows and his, ah, other rather large tentacle action. Come on! Don't judge me! Dude should have known that sitting like that was going to be junk-action central! It's why you never see guys at a yoga class. Unless, of course it's hot naked yoga....

Happy Birthday Howard Phillips Lovecraft!!!

by now you should know to click on it for an awesomely larger image

Well, happy early birthday. I'm posting this a day early because tomorrow I will be out celebrating a real, living friend's birthday (Way to go Colleen! Turning 30!).

Anyway, tomorrow is Howard's 120th birthday, and what better way to spend it than with a Lovecraftian themed cocktail and lots of cheese. Below is my version of the Corpse Reviver #2, which I have re-titled for this special occasion:

The Herbert West

Components:

1 shot gin (I have Philly pride, so I prefer Blue Coat)

1 shot Lillet Blanc

1 shot Domaine de Canton

The juice of half a small lemon (you can go easy on this)

Dash of Pernod (or Absinthe if you're fancier)

Pour all ingredients over ice, shake well, and pour into a slightly chilled cocktail glass. I used Manhattan glasses from the 1960's, but champagne cups, not flutes, work just as well.

Now, the best part of any drink is the garnish (which, clearly, I forgot to add) and you have some choices with this: you can either use a slice of starfruit or long lime peels that you curl slightly and hang over the edge (like tentacles). I prefer the star fruit because it stays a bit better but limes are easier to find. You can also use Whiskey Stones in a tumbler with this drink. They won't water down your drink and they give the impression of Cyclopean ruins at the bottom of the sea (tell your friends the drink is called Dagon if you're going with this method).

This cocktail is best enjoyed whilst sitting on a moss covered mausoleum in a disturbing New England backwoods; preferably you'd also be fainting from seeing some terror or, you know, an Italian guy.

However, if a trip to Rhode Island isn't in your future tomorrow, you can also just drink this in your living room (yes, that's really my living room) while listening to the HP Lovecraft Literary Podcast (very funny and well produced) and watching out for night gaunts, re-animated fiends, prime numbers, monolithic architecture, rats, Jell-O, and your weird neighbor who always complains about his AC unit.

Add some dry ice around the place to give it a murky miasmic ambiance and you’re good to go!

Enjoy!!!

scotch egg

me: my tummy hurts.

johnny sorrow: you should watch this you tube video!

me: um, I really just want to lie down and rub my belly for a few hours....

johnny sorrow: no, this is awesome, you need to see it.

me: ok.....

[insert vomitty eyes and lots of gagging]

This is epic

Oh snap! Spinner.com is letting you preview the Scott Pilgrim soundtrack and score! That's pretty awesome, and what's even more awesome is holding your cellphone to your computer speakers so you can record Kim Pine shouting, "We are Sex Bob-omb!" as your cellphone ring. What? You think you're better than me because you download your ringtones? Pfft.

Jersey Thor

Thor is the nicest guy of the Marvel universe. I've sure there's some time when he's totally a dick, but he calls all chicks "fair this, and maiden that" and gives the best adjectives to describe people. But what if he was a total dick from Jersey (spoiler: I'm from Jersey)? I wish I could say that I came up with the dialog myself, but that was written by the coolest guy around (another spoiler: I'm marrying him).

click on the picture for a larger size

Oh Mr. Morrison, You need some American history

Batman is stuck traveling through time trying to get back to his current timeline. I can accept that. Nobody is ever killed (unless you're Gwen Stacy), they just get sucked into time portals, other dimensions, or remain frozen for years. It's comics, we accept these things. One day, I will learn to accept that Norman Osborn has really come back and is not a skrull (But that Gwen Stacy boned him? No. Noooo, no, no).

But you know what I can't accept? Historic Inaccuracies. Yes, that needed to be capitalized. And yes, the fact that for some reason, there were prehistoric men wandering around North America really irritates me. But the worst of it was, by far, the latest: Return of Bruce Wayne #4.

OK Grant Morrison, I get it, you're Scottish, maybe you just think that in 1870's everyone is a cowboy. But let me paint a picture for you:

The year is some time in the late 19th century, almost the turn of the century. The East coast of America is an industerial powerhouse. There are railroads crisscrossing the land, factories filling the sky with smoke and soot, trolley lines dragging people all around town. People are experiencing elevators in new tall skyscrapers, electric lights twinkle and pop, Henry Ford is muttering something about a Model T. It is an amazing techincal age and the East Coast is on the cusp of experiencing it all. It looks like this:

So, can you tell me why, why, whyyyyyy is Gotham done up like some place out in the boonies of the midwest? This is Gotham. A city. A city which would not have a chanty town of clapboard and dirt roads, but of filthy tenants packed with imigrants and swarming with cholera. So, why is Gotham drawn up as some dang whiskey town outside of whatever terrible reservation Andrew Jackson created? Why does it look like this:

Oh, and what's with the apple tree?

Yes, of course, let's drop everything, make Gotham into Deadwood (brief pause: I love that show), and add in Jonah Hex, the guy with the septate hymen for a mouth who should gone and cut that piece off ages age (Seriously, you can't just take a pair of scissors to that shit? What happens when he yawns? Or wants to eat a hoagie?). Also, let's point out he is wearing his CONFEDERATE uniform. In a town that is clearly part of the NORTHERN states. Come on Mr. Morrison, let that one sink in for a bit....

This is BATMAN who lives in a city called GOTHAM. You had the chance to make an awesome Victorian Gothic story, but instead, you gave us cowboys with the names of Chuck, Lucky, and Bucky (honestly). I could have seen bustles and corsets and awesome cravets! But instead I get ten gallon hats and fucking saddle bags! I...you know what? I can't. I got to stop. Because this story, like drinking too much wine, is giving me a headache.

I think I'm just going to lie down here and read some Action Comics starring Lex Luthor..ahh, so much better....ha...Mr. Mind is adorable.

Angel met Law & Order and then they had a weird baby

'sup Bob.

I loved Buffy, and I loved Angel. Vampires, witches, ghosts, etc etc. All great. Loved the giant cast of characters, loved the cheesy monsters, loved (and still repeat) the one liners.

Yet, I have another love, and that love is Law & Order (DUN dun!). Heck, if you have cable, it's on all the time on 6 different channels, so even if I didn't really love it at first, the Stockholm Syndrome of being with it 24/7 got me falling pretty hard.

So, what if they joined my love of Jos Whedon with my love of corpses in a dumpster? Why, they would birth the Dresden Files! Now, we know that genetics can take two really good looking people and end up making a pretty unattractive child (cough, Rumor Willis, cough cough), so there is no way that the Dresden Files (which I am now going to call DF for short) could be as good at both Angel and Law & Order. For one thing, they would have to contend with the one thousand spinoffs and one million episodes that Law & Order has under its belt. Also, seriously, I had such a crush on Wesley and Bob is just not doing it for me, regardless of the British accent. Ah, Wesley with the glasses and knowledge about demons and hand to hand combat....sigh.

But that aside, I have sat down and watched the first three episodes and they are pretty good. Not great (come on, the first one had the trope of a little boy in trouble), but unlike something like Eureka, where I could barely focus on those characters, DF is actually getting me into the story line. I'm interested in the back stories, Bob and Dresden's magical abilities, and of course, any and all wonderful ghouls or demons they're going to bring up (please, not too much CGI, I need to see some rubber costumes).

And visually, it's really getting me. I love the look of Dresden's office: Old magic books, dusty looking things in jars, candles, Bob's skull. All great.

I guess the big disappointment is that it only ran for a season. Luckily, it's all on Hulu, but if I'm enjoying the first three episodes this much, I know I will be itching for more when I finish all of them. Luckily, they have Warehouse 13 up (and still running), so I can get my big dusty book fix somewhere.

Scott Pilgrim made me cry

I've wiped enough tears away to write this

Let's just get one thing straight on this blog: I do not talk about my personal life, because I think personal blogs are lame. That being said, let me tell you why Scott Pilgrim made me weep into my fiancé's arms like the girly wimp that I am:

Last year, my man and I were having a crazy rough patch. There was lots of tears, fighting, and counseling. I was pretty darn sure we were splitsville. I was terribly sad, didn't want to leave the house, and basically wallowed in my own misery. I also started playing my DS a lot.

Long, awkward story short, we got through it, got engaged, and now pretty much read comics in bed, or jump around all day talking about how awesome it is to be in love and to be getting married. It is more or less a happy ending (I still haven't finished The World Ends With You, but I'm getting there).

So, why am I bringing up something uber personal? Because Bryan Lee O'Malley does an almost pitch perfect job and explaining that kind of awkward relationship. He does this in the last two pages at the end (SPOILER) where Scott and Ramona have the simplest of all conversations, "Well, we try again." Holy crap, did I cry. When you love somebody, and that person loves you, and all you two do is screw it up, the best thing you can ask for is to try again. And you take that leap.

Just completely perfect.

Yep, that's the one and only personal blog post you'll ever get, so enjoy it, bitches.

Alternate Batman idea by me!

I kind of like to think that for a moment, between being superior to everyone, Ra's al Ghul was a nice grandpa. See a bigger version here.

I put a lot of terrible things in my mouth

It's true, I eat a lot of gross stuff. I drink a lot of real painful booze. I'm that person that thought Bailey's and cereal would be seriously the best idea ever (it wasn't). So, needless to say, if it looks even remotely appetizing and easy to cook, I will buy it.

Which is where our story begins.....

Bilinski's Chicken Meatloaf. Granted, it sounds terrible to begin with (meatloaf should really contain some kind of cow bits, right?), but I was starving and it said ready in four minutes. Plus there were all these good things in it. Listen to these ingredients: Skinless chicken leg meat, sea salt, parmesan cheese, garlic, onions, tomatoes. That is some serious gourmet shit right there! chicken LEG meat, not chicken mystery meat. This totally should have been kind of tasty!

But my friends, it was not. Maybe it was because I was lazy and microwaved it (spoiler alert, I microwave everything), but everything that could be wrong it was wrong with it.

Texture: Rubbery, gummy, wobbly. It was the bastard child of Jell-O and a bike tire.

Color: Grey. When is chicken grey? Couldn't they have tossed in one coloring agent to make this look like something better than slime mold?

Taste: I can't. I just can't. There was no taste. It was like I was trying to bite my way through the phonebook. The tomato sauce on top didn't even taste like tomatoes. How do you fuck that up??????

Visual: This part is really the worst. I don't know if you can see it, but on that package they have a little clip art of a real meatloaf. You know, it actually looks like a loaf. This impostor was concave. Yes, a meatloaf was con-fucking-cave.

After a few bites where I tried, I really tried, to deal with this monstrous beast of a meat cube, I just gave up. It was trashed and I had to cleanse my palate with cheese.

Never ever buy this product. It is the vile afterbirth of Rosemary's baby.

I was going to write about comics, but OMG Lost Finale tonight!

So, instead gushing about Girl Comics (which now I think I will wait until the last one comes out, because seriously I can't concentrate on anything else right now), I am just going to post pictures of my newest amusement: Danbo!

Danbo is always being a jerk about my designs

But he likes my taste in music

Margaritas go straight to his head

Brian Michael Bendis, why won't you let Siege be great?

I feel your pain, dude.

When I first saw the variant cover for Siege 4, I thought Iron Man was holding his head in his hands, like I do when I found out I'm at a party without an open bar. Now I see that he's putting the helmet on, clearly to hide himself from the lamefest that was Siege.

I don't even know where to begin with this, because once again we were given something totally awesome to start with, and then stuck with kind of a luke warm pile of "that sucked." OK, I'm lying, it wasn't totally awesome, it was nonsensical and kind of random (Attack Asgard? Because? Loki wants it? And what does this have to do with American security, Mr. Osborn?), but we were suppose to view this as the big summer blockbuster. Lots of action and explosions and not too much meaty drama. But even as a blockbuster where all you have to do is sit back and enjoy the punching, the plot was stilted and jumpy. It felt like Bendis was trying to drag us through as quickly as possible so he can get into the Heroic Age because he got bored of Osborn.

And you know what, lets be honest can a pile of evil doers on goblin gliders (which, by the way has a giant rocket on it, so it's clearly NOT a glider) really do anything to a magical floating realm of the gods? Clearly, if Osborn (and Loki) wanted to take Asgard all they had to do was send in Crazy McNuts Sentry and the Void would pop out and do all the work. But no, they wanted a splash page, so they toss some magical rocks in there and call it a day.

OK, and let's talk about the Void. Dude ripped a fucking god in half (FYI: Olympian gods have a an intestinal tract). And then does in another god, and oh yes, before all this, DESTROYS THE REALM OF THE NORSE GODS. And Bendis, you have the balls to tell me that Thor's fucking hammer can take down the Void? No. I call bullshit on you right there. Did you not see how seriously gross that whole busting open Ares like a bag of rap snacks looked? There is no way that a hammer, no matter how magical (and awesome to see at the end of Iron Man 2, by the way) it is can do that. The Void was this crazy pile of awesome power and you're trying to tell me, Thor, and only Thor, can take him down? Bendis just needed a quick finish, so he lets Thor pull a smash n' end it like in Secret Invasion (same plot ender in two years. Awesome creativity).

Blah.

Well, that's my take. I know that normally I toss in something witty here about how I'm going to go back to drinking to dull the pain of a terrible comic, but I've (surprise!) got a pretty hangover, so I'm going to go back to my water and Rite Aid brand aspirins and not say any more on this subject.

Oh, wait. I am.

Seriously, why can't Osborn be a skrull already? It doesn't make sense that he's alive. I don't care if it's been practically ten years since he returned, I want that character written off as dead dead. Make him a freaking skrull and make me happy, Bendis. Or at least give me back the Wasp.

Lost, it's been a while.

So, I almost gave up the ghost on this blog. "Writing is hard!" I thought, and why should I bother? Well, lucky for you (all one of you) I have some liquid courage pumping through my system (not, sadly, to be confused with Liquid Plumber, no matter how much it looks like a kamikaze shot at one of those frat bars...).

What should I talk about? Comics? No, not yet. I have to be a little less under the influence for the comics post I'm planning, or else you're just going to get one of those weird angry rants where I curse a bunch and end up with no pants in somebody's living room (see: New Years).

Tonight, I am going to give my quick and drunk (which shall now on be tagged as Q&D) thoughts on the Lost premiere:

1. Seriously, how many fucking times did we have to see Juliet get sucked down that hole? And then, just when we think Sawyer finally has her back, bang, she's dead. And DEAD dead, too! The next commercial those ABC assholes show is V, with Elizabeth Mitchell's face popping up all over the place. We get it! She's really not coming back! Stop making me cry!

2. I am now counting six people from Deadwood on this show. You know what? I fucking love this. Deadwood was one of the best shows on TV. Do you know how many times I loll around shouting, "Ah apologize!" A lot. If she hadn't died, it would be awesome if Trixie could have greeted Sol with, "You want a free fuck?"

3. Tangent fucking timelines. I would say it would blow my mine, but I just read Volume 3 of Atomic Robo. Oddly enough, I felt prepared.

About that tangent timeline (the one where the island sinks)...So, anything prior to 1977 happened when pertaining to the island. Anything after that (e.g. Jacob at Sun and Jin's wedding), did not happen. So, Sawyer is the only Lostie (of the ones we know meant Jacob) who actually met Jacob, right? I could sit here and list all the other times, but if in this TTL (tangent timeline) the island is totally gone, one can assume that Jacob might be lost (ha! Pun intended at this point! I'm kind of drunk!).

OK, I have maybe one million more Lost theories, but they need to be put on the back burner for a bit. I need to finish off all this Dharma beer I wrapped up last night before I get whipped into a Lost frenzy and wake up tomorrow wearing a half a jumpsuit somewhere....