Stan Lee made the amazing techno-colored puppy coat!

So, the big comic news of the month is Stan Lee's Hockey Guardians, which are NHL themed characters. Now, I'm never one to judge (Ahhhhhahahaha), but I'm guessing some hockey brohs got drunk on jager shots and decided to make some money off of the whole "Iron Man Spider Man" thing. Congrats, dudes, you've finally learned how to crib geek culture like everyone else (it only took you thirty years).

Anyway, what ever, I don't watch hockey, and unless it's a Pet Avengers tie-in I'll never even read these comics (watch the cartoons? I don't even know what they're doing with all these dudes). Until, that is, I saw this:

IT'S A DUDE WHO HAS A PUPPY CREATING JACKET!

Seriously, this is now my new favorite character (Until Troll from Thunderbolts finally starts kicking some ass). He can create dogs from his jacket! Does it get any better? Can his dollar store Wolverine knock-off helmet tap a keg and pour me a pint?! Are his Rob Liefeld pouches filled with nachos?! Are his upper arms chafing in that leather trench coat?! Why does every "dark badass" character have to wear a leather trench coat?!

If that dude could make me some tacos, get me a brew AND find me an adorable pet, I might actually start watching hockey (ahahahahahahaha...snort, choke, gasp for breathe, fall back on the couch and continue to eat some cheese fries).